Controlling- Poem.

When you get grief for being yourself.

Wanting to be free sometimes without catering to someone else.

Because you deserve the time you get spend by yourself.

You work so damn hard not to pay attention to you.

Because you should be able to do anything you want to do, 

Without giving someone else the power to dictate what is best or not for you. 

Because you know your heart and soul is amazing.

And this person will always be the only one complaining.

Not allowing you to do simple things without a fight.

Trying to force the words I love you down your throat and expecting you to say it back every time.

But you keep giving chances.

Because you can’t seem to wrap your own damn head around all of this madness. 

Because you only see what’s good, not what’s bad.

This is the problem and now look where you stand. 

But the issue at hand isn’t "who I am".

Yet they will always tell me that I am the reason they feel extremely hurt or mad.

So you change who you are just to fit into the perfect image inside of their imagination.

Losing yourself slowly without any intention.

And you begin to live this sad grey life.

Learning to hate the person you sleep next to at night.

Hoping and waiting for someone to rescue you.

But when they do, 

You become the cheating liar and person to blame for everything that's happened to you. 

But you'll learn over time once you re-find yourself.

That you were just hiding underneath all of the controllers that only made you feel bad for yourself.

And you let them take over and bury you down.

But you dug tunnels through the dirt and finally found your way out.

Not to ever be controlled again.

You never will,

So when you feel someone else trying too,

They will never win.

What you need is someone to accept you for your greatness.

And not gate you inside even if it’s in a beautiful palace.

You cannot be caged nor tied down.

You are a beautiful woman that won’t settle until you meet someone who makes you feel worthy without a damn crown.

You’ll learn that the only person that has full control is God himself. 

And that a lot of your problems were created yourself. 

Because you only have control of your own actions, choices and decisions in this life.

So don’t let anyone else make you feel less than who you truly are because that will never be right. 

Just keep being you even if you make mistakes.

You will learn from them someday.

And you will become a human made of solid gold.

But that’s when you’re going to have to watch out for the thieves who will try to manipulate you to steal full control.

Because the bad will always be bad.

Forcing the good out in a way that the good will never truly understand.

So when you sense these signs of controlling forces in your life,

Run far away as they will kill your soul without any regard to what’s right.

And one day you’ll thank God and yourself.

For being strong enough or not allowing anyone to break you down.

Because you learned that God himself has a funny way of working your entire life out. 

Written by: Tiffany Bales