Bippity Bopitty

Phone buzzed on silent.

You stopped picking up.
I still tried.
I thought it was love.
Disappointment.
Casted down upon my face.
I missed our laughs
I missed our dates.

Friends asked.
Why I stayed.
They couldn’t see
the unseen hole through me.
And I still hoped,
Reality would change.
Back to the life,
We anticipated happening.
Instead, I watched each dream
Collapse fatally. 

That felt like a beating heart

Without a pulse.
Time didn't stop.
All I did was blame myself.
For the things you said
I did wrong.
I’d apologize.
Cause I never knew
What you fucking wanted.

When we should’ve taken
the kids to Motocross.
Or went on that trip
To the fucking Bahamas.
Instead, I found myself kneeling
At the cross.
Praying heavily,
You’d wake up.
and see everything you lost.

I still went
back and forth.
Loving the man in front of me.
Praying for the man I once knew.
Asking myself
Constantly,
Who the fuck are you?

While you drifted further
Away from the truth.
New variants,
Blurred favorable narratives
Of what I once knew.
A wise woman.
Maimed in pursuit.
Of a happily ever after,
You weren’t lively enough to choose.

Turns out, you can hurt someone
with the fucking truth.
The more you are honest,
Deceits weasel,
their way fucking through.
Guiding gracious butterflies
To be trapped in dark webs.

Maybe we’d still be together 

If you took responsibility
For everything you did.

Truth is,

I had no other choice

But to let go.

You labeled me the bad guy.

While I took the high road.

If only I would've known.

You were already long gone.

And hurtful words
We can’t retract.
Precious time
Isn’t allotted back.
You just made me, fucking sad.
All I did was believe in the
Beautiful things you once said and did.

But I should’ve listened
To what other people said.
I should’ve looked closer
Into the red flags.
Though, I was never really afraid
of taking a risk.

I master authenticity.
You fabricate dreams.
Magically making
them resemble reality.
Too bad real life ain’t all bippity boppity.

I should’ve known better.
Until I look at everything,
Loving you taught me.

Written by Epiphany Tiffany