Heartaches Reruns.

-

I wish I just had the memories

from the faraway past.

Because something far distant

is a lot harder to look back at.

But we had to retract.

And the latest version

keeps my mind from ceasing the flashbacks. 

 

I know that it’s passed.

I just wish that the path from our journey

was further away.

Or that there was never another chance 

for our love to astray. 

Maybe if we only happened once in this lifetime 

I wouldn’t be feeling this way. 

 

Yet somehow I’ve been okay.

After all that’s happened to me,

I never imagined 

I would be able to say. 

There’s somethings I wish I could tell you.

But you probably wouldn’t even believe me if I’d say. 

I think now the only reason I really cherish those days,

Is cause I was so in love and devoted.

But facing that heartbreak 

only made me become brave.


Sure, maybe I thought 

I had finally got it right. 

But sometimes life turns out to have better 

arrangements than mine.

Sometimes it can wreak such chaos 

and make us both question why. 

So just so you know, 

I really tried to hold on 

to keep that fairy tale alive.

But I can look back now 

and see why it didn’t work out perfectly 

every single time. 

 

Then somebody tells me.

“When you really love someone 

you just want them to be happy.”

And that couldn’t have been said more true.

Even though we didn’t end up together,

A part of my heart 

will always have a softness for you.

 

I don’t know about you,

But sometimes it’s nice to remember 

all of the shit we used to do.

From punk ass kids to adulting things.

Yeah, it would’ve been a hell of a lot easier for me 

to just forget you when I was seventeen. 


Because the not so distant moments well, 

That’s what really imbedded the treasuries.

So maybe I only remember the good 

to make those thoughts on you easier on me. 

So I could lock them up inside of my chest 

and bury them deep.

With an invisible X on my heart to mark the spot 

where you happened to me. 

 

It still may not stop the tides 

from drifting to our days.

Memories always seem perfect 

once the bad days wash away. 

Because I can still remember the last words 

you ever spoke to me.

 

So maybe everything between us was a lie 

on your side.

I’m okay with that narrative.

I’ve sat with every single 

analyzing why.

Still, my feelings for you were always undoubted. 

So maybe this is just a reminiscence 

of your presence to remind myself where I once stood.

That now has me thinking. 

I wouldn’t want to change the past now 

even if I could.


I’d honestly thank you. 

Because if it weren’t for you,

This brave heart of mine 

wouldn’t have made it through 

everything that it’s dejectedly been through.

Or have been able to weather 

all of the lies 

and traumatic goodbyes, 

Since you. 



Written by Epiphany Tiffany 

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